Category Archives: Movies with a Hospital setting

Night Call Nurses (1972)

night call nurses 1

By Richard Winters

My Rating: 2 out of 10

4-Word Review: Sex makes good medicine.

Barbara (Patty Byrne), Janis (Alana Stewart), and Sandra (Mittie Lawrence) are three young women starting out in the nursing field. The film analyzes their various and sometimes amusing predicaments while on the job as well as their sex lives.

The film moves at a decent pace, but seems disjointed with poor story and character progression. Things are thrown in just to keep it moving, but with no real connection to anything else. Amateurish production values permeate and Jonathan Kaplan’s directorial debut is for the most part best forgotten. The only mildly interesting scene involved a therapy group where all the members strip off their clothes as well as having one of the members think that she is being driven insane by the group’s instructor.

The attempts at lightheartedness and humor are strained and flat. Only one brief exchange during the entire duration managed to elicit a small chuckle from myself and it goes like this:

Male Patient: (While looking at the nurse’s nametag on her uniform) Is Janis your name, or the name of your left titty?

Janis: (While giggling) Janis is my name. Irene is the name of my left tiitty.

The acting is quite poor with everyone phoning in their parts. Alana Stewart who was at one time the wife of actor George Hamilton and later rock legend Rod Stewart as well as the mother of Ashley Hamilton and Kimberly Stewart mouths her lines in a lifeless and emotionless fashion that resembles her beautiful but blank blue eyes. However, recent pics of her are amazing as she looks like she hasn’t aged a day since she has done this and I’ll give her credit there. Despite only doing one other picture besides this one Byrne is the one that gives the strongest performance particularly her effective crying, which seems real.

There is enough nudity to satisfy the voyeurs including the opening sequence where one of the mentally-ill patients’ strips off her clothes and then jumps off the roof of a building. However, you basically only see their breasts and the sex is handled in such a mechanical and unimaginative way that it fails to titillate at all.

The Shout Factory DVD issue has a great picture quality much like Private Duty Nurses, but the sound is a problem. There is a background rumbling heard throughout that resembles talking to someone on the phone with wind blowing through the receiver, or speaking to someone in the car with the windows down and wind blowing in.

My Rating: 2 out of 10

Released: June 10, 1972

Runtime: 1Hour 14Minutes

Rated R

Director: Jonathan Kaplan

Studio: New World Pictures

Available: DVD (Roger Corman’s Nurses Collection) 

Private Duty Nurses (1971)

private duty nurses 2

By Richard Winters

My Rating: 4 out of 10

4-Word Review: Sex on the job.

Three friends (Katherine Cannon, Joyce Williams, Pegi Boucher) join the nursing field and get their first jobs at a local hospital. Together they must deal with the pressures of the profession as well as the dating scene and some of the lecherous, cheating men that come with it.

If one approaches this thing with extremely modest expectations then it is not too bad. It is compact enough and moves at a decent pace and while not exactly compelling it isn’t completely boring either. The girls deal with a lot of problems that every generation goes through particularly on the relationship end, which gives it a certain relevancy. It is also nice see them doing some actual medical duties and in one case even saving a young child’s life.

Where it fails is in its misguided idea of trying to tackle ‘serious’ issues. The story thread dealing with Spring’s (Cannon) romance with biker Domino (Dennis Redfield) who has had several serious head injuries and is told if he gets just one more it could prove fatal and yet continues to race anyways is predictably overwrought. The thread dealing with racism has been done so much better in far superior productions that it seems almost pointless here and the way it gets resolved is a bit farfetched. The third story having to do with water pollution takes on too much and has a wrap-up that is too tidy. The dialogue during a lot of these scenes is corny and the characters are all cardboard.

The three female leads look gorgeous both with their clothes on and off. All three of them appear nude although it is basically just from the waist up. However, if you are a breast fan you should like the scenes here particularly those who enjoy ones that are natural and firm. The nudity is not prevalent, but should be enough to satisfy the skin aficionados. There is also a rape scene near the end that seems to come out of nowhere and gets a bit explicit.

The Shout factory deserves a ‘shout-out’ for their transfer. Although the sound quality isn’t the best and does feature a faint and constant clicking sound during the last half-hour the picture quality is superb. The colors are bright and vivid without any of the faded or grainy look that usually permeates most low budget transfers from the 70’s. To certain extent it comes off looking like it had just been filmed yesterday.

My Rating: 4 out of 10

Released: September 1, 1971

Runtime: 1Hour 20Minutes

Rated R

Director: George Armitage

Studio: New World Pictures

Available: DVD (The Nurses Collection)

Visiting Hours (1982)

visiting hours 2

By Richard Winters

My Rating: 3 out of 10

4-Word Review: He doesn’t like women.

Deborah Ballin (Lee Grant) is an outspoken reporter who does a news segment dealing with domestic violence that angers misogynist Colt (Michael Ironside). For revenge he attacks her inside her home, but she manages to escape and gets treated at the local hospital. Unfortunately the psychotic Colt continues to stalk her inside the hospital, which causes her, other patients and the hospital staff to fear for their lives.

The script is predictable and unimaginative. It sticks to the tired 80’s slasher formula like it is a religion. The set-up is awkward and rushed while the rest of the film dealing with Colt’s perpetual stalking becomes prolonged and redundant. The scares lack excitement and the frights are non-existent. The only potentially interesting part that could’ve allowed this film to really stand out is when Deborah is taken into the operating room and put under anesthesia and thinks that the surgeon arriving to do the operation is Colt in disguise. The film teases the viewer with this possibility, but then chickens out.

The only novelty is having a 55-year-old actress as the heroine as opposed to the youthful, virginal looking types that get cast in these things in-part because of their screaming abilities. Having Grant playing a self-assured, confident character is refreshing change of pace for the genre, but then the film compromises even this by having Deborah’s young nurse played by Linda Purl become the target of Colt’s evil rage and by the end it’s Purl who has the most screen time.

Ironside is a competent actor and it is no surprise that he would be cast in the role of a killer due to his menacing facial features. He is talented enough to make the scenes he is in interesting despite the fact that he says less than 15 words during the whole film. Still the cutaways showing the reason for his mental illness being due to him witnessing as a child his mother throwing boiling water on his father is hooky. Also having him wear a small bell around his neck that rings every time he moves if awfully stupid for a person with a habit of stalking people.

The film has a similar concept to Halloween II that also dealt with a killer stalking a victim while inside a hospital, but here at least they use an actual hospital that is lighted the way a real hospital should be. The foot chase between Grant and Ironside that has them going to all areas of the building reminded me a little of the chase between Genvieve Bujold and Lance LeGault in the film Coma although that one is still far superior to the one here.

There are few mildly intense moments at the end that helps save this from being a complete boring waste, but still does little to make up for the rest of it that falls flat. Oh yeah, William Shatner also appears here in a pointless and dull role as Deborah’s boss.

My Rating: 3 out of 10

Released: May 21, 1982

Runtime: 1Hour 43Minutes

Rated R

Director: Jean-Claude Lord

Studio: 20th Century Fox

Available: DVD

The Student Nurses (1970)

student nurses

By Richard Winters

My Rating: 4 out of 10

4-Word Review: Nurses have special medicine.

Unlike its billing this is NOT a T&A drive-in picture. Yes there is some sex and nudity, but not much and certainly not enough to satisfy the voyeur. The movie is basically just strained, hackneyed drama detailing the lives of four young student nurses (Elaine Giftos, Karen Carlson, Brioni Farrell, and Barbara Leigh). That is so mechanical that you almost wish it did take more of a sleazy, silly route.

The most contrived segment has nurse Giftos trying to bring happiness to an embittered teen with cystic fibrosis. It’s handled with all the same annoying clichés as an episode of one of those old cardboard medical TV shows. The only twist here is that on his last night of life she strips and goes to bed with him, which just makes it even more inane.

The one unique sequence deals with a surprisingly long, drawn out abortion. The woman having the procedure starts to hallucinate under the anesthesia and sees herself having an abortion on a public beach with all sorts of onlookers including young children and a couple of surfer dudes watching.

The film also offers a rare chance to see Katherine ‘Scotty’ Macgreoger. She played Mrs. Olson on the old “Little House on the Prairie” TV show, but did little else outside of that. Here she plays Miss Boswell the girl’s teacher. She has the same controlling, cold exterior as her TV character. She even threatens to dock a girl a full grade point if she doesn’t start to wear longer skirts.

The four female leads are stunningly beautiful. They look and behave very much the same way as a pretty young girl of today would. Unfortunately their acting is terrible and the way they deliver their lines is almost torturous to listen to. It also gets annoying the way they are portrayed. One minute they are liberated and horny and then the next minute they are sweet All-American girls just trying to do the right thing.

My Rating: 4 out of 10

Released: December 2, 1970

Runtime: 1Hour 29Minutes

Rated R

Director: Stephanie Rothman

Studio: New World Pictures

Available: VHS, DVD

The Caretakers (1963)

the caretakers 2

By Richard Winters

My Rating: 6 out of 10

4-Word Review: Doctors with opposing viewpoints.

Two doctors working at a psychiatric hospital come at odds with each other over how to treat their patients. Dr. Donovan MacLeod (Robert Stack) believes in a more humanistic approach in treating mental illness including group therapy and more patient freedoms. Dr. Lucretia Terry (Joan Crawford) is hard-lined and exacts rules on her patients that have severe penalties if broken. The film examines their infighting and how it affects their patients.

Director Hall Bartlett has a nice cinema-verte style to the material that manages to avoid being ‘Hollywoodnized’ or overtly sanitized. The subject is approached in a matter of fact way and the patients are not portrayed as ‘crazy’ or ‘scary’, but instead as sick people looking to get well and learning how to do it. The opening sequence done over the credits and featuring all sorts of moody artsy drawings have an excellent avant-garde flair.

Polly Bergen is effective as Lorna a middle-aged mother and housewife who suffers a nervous breakdown and begrudgingly becomes a member of Dr. MacLeod’s therapy group. Some of her acting particularly when she is having her breakdown is theatrical and over-the-top, but I did like the way Bartlett shows things from her perspective allowing the viewer in a visual sense to feel what she is going through and makes one compassionate and sensitive to her condition.

It is great to see Crawford as always and the scene showing her in a leotard and teaching the other nurses judo lessons is a gem and much too brief. I was hoping to have her play up the part of the heavy more making her almost like a Nurse Ratched, which she could have easily done to perfection, but unfortunately the script doesn’t take advantage of it. I was also disappointed that we never see Crawford ever dealing directly with her patients, which seemed to me should have been necessary.

Stack in the lead is terrible and completely wrong for the part. The role required a man with a more youthful appeal instead of the middle-aged Stack who never displays the kind of sensitivity and compassion that his character supposedly has. Instead he delivers his lines in a stiff and monotone fashion and comes off like he came from the old school of acting.

The scene where his character allows the patients to go to an outdoor park for a picnic and mingle with the staff unsupervised seemed to be pushing the plausibility meter to the extreme. It also makes him look like a complete schmuck who should have known better especially when one of his patients leaves the picnic and runs away while he chases after her in a panic.

The supporting cast is outstanding showcasing many up and coming stars and is one of the major highlights for watching the film. Barbara Barrie is great as the silent and troubled Edna. Janis Paige is excellent as the brassy prostitute Marion. Susan Oliver gives one of her best performances as a young nurse who is just learning how to deal with those with mental illness and Robert Vaughn is also effective as Lorna’s long suffering and confused husband. This is also a great chance to see a young Van Williams before he starred as the Green Hornet as well as the beautiful Sharon Hugueny whose promising acting career was cut short when she was hit years later by a speeding police car.

If you come to this film looking for genuine insight into the illness you will be disappointed as it goes only to the most elementary level into the area of psychiatry. MacLeod’s speeches about how his group therapy can be a ‘cure’ to mental illness are shallow and almost laughable. However, for the era the film manages to be gritty and slick enough to pass as entertainment.

My Rating: 6 out of 10

Released: August 21, 1963

Runtime: 1Hour 37Minutes

Not Rated

Director: Hal Bartlett

Studio: United Artists

Available: VHS, DVD, Amazon Instant Video, Netflix streaming

Britannia Hospital (1982)

Britannia hospital 1

By Richard Winters

My Rating: 7 out of 10

4-Word Review: This hospital needs help.

This is another surreal Lindsay Anderson piece that takes many wild forays and yet still manages to come together as a whole in the end. This is as good, as clever, and as pointed as any of his better known stuff. How this got lost in the shuffle is a mystery, but it really deserves a better look.

The plot pertains to a madcap hospital that is in complete disarray. The head surgeon is preoccupied with a ‘mad scientist’ experiment, the staff is threatening to strike, and the rich patients expect preferential treatment. All of this occurs while the Queen is set for a visit. Leonard Rossiter plays the head administrator that tries to keep it all under control.

Of course it’s not really about the hospital at all, but more a satirical look at British society and the arrogance of the upper crust as well as the apathy of the lower one. It shows how very wide apart they are and how the problem is only acerbated by the upper levels refusal to effectively deal with the lower level and their gripes.

The stuffy formalities of the British have never been played out better. At times it even goes for the jugular. Having the Queen and her entourage literally chased through the hospital by an angry mob is the best.

The cast is full of old British pros and all are quite hammy. Rossiter is the jewel. His nervous looking face and body tics have always been funny, but here they come to a hilt.

There are even a few gory segments that could satisfy almost any horror fan. In particular is Professor Millar (Graham Crowden). The scene where he cuts up a human brain, sticks it in a blender, and then has a cameraman drink it up like a milkshake, is outrageously funny.

The ending is a surprisingly sobering with a profound speech that deals not only with the inevitable advent of technology, but also the complexities of society’s problems, and the minimalism of our existence. Overall it’s not bad.

My Rating: 7 out of 10

Released: May 27, 1982

Runtime: 1Hour 56Minutes

Rated R

Director: Lindsay Anderson

Studio: EMI Films

Available: VHS, DVD, Amazon Instant Video

Halloween II (1981)

By Richard Winters

My Rating: 3 out of 10

4-Word Review: Michael won’t go away.

It’s still Halloween night 1978. Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis) is rushed to the nearby Haddonfield Memorial Hospital to have her wounds attended to while Michael Meyers (Dick Warlock) roams the streets. Eventually he becomes aware of where she is and stalks her in the hospital while killing off anyone who gets in his way.

The film starts out okay. I liked the camera closing in on the pumpkin during the opening credits and revealing the shape of a skull inside. A fiery car crash that burns a kid wearing a similar mask to Michael’s is effectively graphic and  showing things from Michael’s point-of-view as he peers inside the neighbor’s homes has shades of Rear Window to it. However, I was confused why it wasn’t shown through the two eye holes of the mask since Michael was still wearing it and that was how it was done in the first film.

Things start to decline as it goes on and deviates too much to the standard slasher formula. I forget where I read it, but I remember somebody writing about the perennial characteristics of a tacky 80’s slasher film and one of them was having a scared cat jump out at someone some time during the film. The scene where the hospital security guard (Cliff Emmich) is going through the dumpster behind the building I started to think that this is the part for the proverbial scared cat and sure enough within seconds one jumps out pretty much cementing this for me as a second-rate shocker.

Donald Pleasance as Dr. Loomis is solid as always. The intensity that he displays is good and seeing him as a good guy for a change since the majority of his career he played dark and twisted characters is refreshing. Curtis is also good in the reprisal of her part, but for the first hour she barely appears at all. I was also confused with the scene where she for some unexplained reason falls into a comatose state and then just as strangely snaps out of it a few minutes later.

The Meyers character becomes a detriment here. Having him constantly getting shot at and then bouncing back up without any rational explanation was irritating. He gets around at too many different places and seems a little too slick. For instance he’s able to cut off the phone lines to the hospital in some unexplained way as well as slashing the tires of every single car in the hospital’s parking lot. Also, where does a guy who has been institutionalized since age six manage to figure out the meaning and origins of samhain, which is a word that he writes in blood on a wall of a classroom?

There are other loopholes as well. For instance the hospital seems extremely dark and shadowy. Most hospitals I have been to are always well lit inside especially the hallways, but here it is almost like there are no lights on at all. The part where Michael stabs a nurse in her back with a thin surgical blade and then is able to lift her from the floor with it is ridiculous because the blade just wouldn’t be strong enough. The knife that Michael steals from an old lady (Lucille Benson) when he sneaks into her house is different from the one that he jams into the desk of a classroom that he breaks into.

The extreme lapses of logic are a big problem. When the film starts to have no bearing in reality then I find it hard if not impossible to get caught up into it. Clearly the screenwriter and director were making up the rules as they went along causing the climatic sequence that should have been suspenseful to be, at least to me, boring and annoying instead.

My Rating: 3 out of 10

Released: October 30, 1981

Runtime: 1Hour 32Minutes

Rated R

Director: Rick Rosenthal

Studio: Universal

Available: DVD, Blu-ray, Amazon Instant Video 

Young Doctors in Love (1982)

By Richard Winters

My Rating: 5 out of 10

4-Word Review: He tastes the urine.

This is pretty much what you would expect from Gary Marshall, Penny’s brother, and creator of such loud comedies as the TV-show ‘Laverne and Shirley’. Here though the majority of the jokes actually work. Yes it’s still juvenile and crude with nothing real amazing, but if you come in with moderate expectations you might be pleasantly surprised.

There are of course the expected bombs sprinkled throughout. The worst bit features Michael Richards as a hit man going after another patient who is a member of a crime family. Richards is always funny, sometimes just when he is standing there, however the gag gets stretched out too far. It becomes redundant and cartoonish almost like a poor man’s version of a Wiley E. Coyote cartoon.

The worst thing is that the comedy has no edge to it. It’s modeled after Airplane, but doesn’t have the same satirical jabs. It should have done to old medical TV-shows what Airplane did to disaster movies. Here it just tries to be cute with a vaudeville mindset that becomes too soft, good- natured, and one-dimensional and ends up leaving you with an empty feeling. This is too bad because old shows like ‘Marcus Welby M.D.  are just begging to be made fun of.

Michael McKean and Sean Young look much, much younger and make for a cute couple. This is before all of Young’s troubles and dismal direct to video movie roles. She was still considered the promising up and coming starlet and she looks pretty and has a terrific figure to boot.

Harry Dean Stanton is a real surprise. Usually he is given low key roles, but here he is a wacky guy that is hilarious especially in a very funny ‘urine tasting’ segment. Hector Elizondo is also in rare form playing a man disguised as a woman and just seeing him in a dress is amazing.

Dabney Coleman though is wasted. He is well cast, but having him go completely bonkers at the end seems dumb. The worst travesty is with former ‘Avengers’ star Patrick Macnee. At first it seems like inspired casting to have such a proper English gentlemen in the middle of complete chaos. However, after the first few minutes he pretty much disappears and this is a shame because they could have done a lot more with his character.

My Rating: 5 out of 10

Released: July 16, 1982

Runtime: 1Hour 36Minutes

Rated R

Director: Garry Marshall

Studio: 20th Century Fox

Available: VHS, DVD